We have peace but we're not getting closer. I'm giving it time, I'm not sharing hurt or pain, but it is finding its way out through me being somewhat passive-aggressive.
The past week she has told me that she wants me to be more present and participating in planning the future, moving to a different city, looking ahead the next steps. I told her that I'm still healing, and that it is difficult for me to fully engage while I have this hurt. That stops the discussion.
This is the same pattern. She asks for something, and I'm totally honest and say I need healing, then she goes silent and avoids me for a few days. Then, rinse/repeat. I would love if she would respond with "Honey, I'm so sorry, I want to help you through this hurt, I want to support you through the pain, tell me what I can do, how can I help us rebuild." But she's simply not ready to do that.
So we have peace but nothing is getting resolved. I hold out hope that she will come to the table ready to reconcile, and so I wait.
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